Tag Archives: humor

Hopping #whatdoyousee

cute-unicorn

Image provided by Sadje found on Flicker

I heard the sizzle of the air inches in front of my face.  Too close!  I turned.  They were coming up the back side of the hill as well.

The entire landscape around our tiny refuge was scorched to the bare rock, life withering in front of the army of killer bots.

I turned to the Hopper.

“Jim, we need to Hop!  Now!  Get us out of here…”

He stared at me for a moment.  “You know, Sarge,” he said, “it takes a bit of planning to put in the proper coordinates and stuff.  Who knows where we’ll land?  Maybe in “The Day After” as the H-Bombs are going off.”

“I don’t care, just put in a random sequence, any sequence!” Continue reading

The Self Appointed Expert

You

What you’re doing is wrong
Can’t you see I’m right?
I thought about it all day
And worked on it all night
You think I’m just a noob
That hasn’t got a clue
Let me tell you, mister
I know a lot more than you!
Sure you have experience
And you have an advanced degree
But I know the greatest expert
Is nobody but me!
I heard about it when I was six
About ten years ago
And in those intervening years
I found all there is to know
No, I haven’t really used it
Why do you even ask?
It is beneath me
To take on that silly task
So don’t you keep on chuckling
At all the insults I hurled
Don’t you know I’m the greatest expert
That there is in this great world? Continue reading

The Weekly Smile Week 2 #weeklysmile

Weekly Smile #WeeklySmile

Weekly Smile #WeeklySmile

Hi all and welcome to the second week of The Weekly Smile!  There was a lot to smile about this last week.  I had some good conversations with family members and there were a few birthdays in that area.  In general things went well.  But I have 2 1/2 smiles for this week.

The first is The Weekly Smile itself.  It did much better than I expected.  We had 19 entries!  And there was a lot of going back and forth between people.  That is where it all happens – thinking positive thoughts and writing a post is a good start, but the sharing is where it turns into a great event.  You cane see last week’s smiles here. Continue reading

Plans for World Domination

earth

One of the first rules of blogging is to never compare your blog to anybody else’s blog. You can borrow ideas you like (don’t steal, though), and you can share with them, but never say, “Why do they have 2,000,000 followers while I only have 20?” Everyone is different.

OK, now that I’ve gotten that out of the way, I have to say that during all of the year end stats sharing I noticed that I received views from far fewer countries last year than most of the blogs I follow that have a similar number of followers. Not only that, the number of different countries that the views to my blog came from has decreased by 10% from 2014 to 2015 while the number of actual views increased by 100% (doubled). So where is my International audience? More important, how can I increase that audience? Continue reading

Search Terms

internet

Do you ever look at the search terms people have used to get to your blog? Unfortunately because of privacy you can only see a small sprinkling of them, but it is sometimes fun to dig through.

I’ll admit, even though I said “fun” in the last paragraph, the search terms I see are very, very boring compared to some that I’ve seen others laugh about on their blogs. Yeah, I’m jealous.  Well, not really since i don’t really want my blog to be seen as a psychopath’s hang out.  Having a pysho-writer is bad enough, I don’t need pyscho-readers too.

Most of the search terms I see are very boring. I get a lot for a kayak review I once did. In fact, Google “Jackson Journey 14 review”. Did you notice that the Trent’s World review is in the top 5? There have been times that no matter how I termed it, my review was at the very top of the Google search.  And, funny, I received over a thousand hits for my Kindle review over the first 3 days when I put it out, each search seeming to use a different search term (there are dozens).  After the first few days there have been absolutely zero. Not a single hit.  I literally dug through 50 pages of search results and it wasn’t there.  When I was getting a hit almost every minute I had looked and it was on first page.  Did Amazon complain and get it removed from search results? Continue reading

Time

The Insistance of Prime

While searching for a topic for today’s post I realized that I haven’t complained about my lack of time in quite some time. Yes, I have had posts stating that I was taking a blog slowdown because of lack of time, but no posts were I have actually sat down and whined complained talked about my lack of time. It’s funny, these types of posts used to be a fixture here at Trent’s World and came up with clockwork precision. Oh well, I guess I just haven’t had the time to post one.

It isn’t that I’ve finally found myself rich with time. No, no, I haven’t found that elusive door to step sideways from the stream of time and make it stand still while I did the things I need to do. I still have that same lack of time as I’ve always had. I think it’s because I’ve been too busy to complain. It’s just awful when you’re too busy “doing” to complain that you don’t have enough time to do anything, isn’t it? Continue reading

For the Safety of the Planet

city

Undetected by the planet below, the fleet moved into position. Each ship could shoot a beam with the equivalent energy of a 10 gigaton thermonuclear device exploding every second. In a matter of minutes the entire planet would be sterilized.

This planet posed a danger to the entire galaxy. The dominant life form was belligerent. They were very hostile and had constant wars amongst themselves. They hated each other for their differences instead of celebrating their common good. Over all, these violent creatures seemed to be emotional and intellectual idiots, yet they had mastered space travel. Soon they’d start populating their own solar system. From there it would be only a matter of time before they’d reach for the stars. It would be easiest to stop the menace while they were still confined to the cradle of their mother planet. Continue reading

No More Turtlenecks! (Until October….)

31 March - Turtleneck (and hat!)

31 March – Turtleneck (and hat!)

It must be spring.  Why?  Because Trent is no longer wearing a turtleneck!

Last October I wrote an post called “Turtleneck Trent“.  In it I talked about my turtlenecks.  You see, I wear a turtleneck almost everyday from sometime in October until sometimes in March.  It’s my signature, even more than the hat.  Occasionally I will go without the hat. Continue reading

The Foss-McDonald Glacier

You can imagine our delight when we heard a new glacier had been discovered in Dennis Port, Massachusetts, of all places. The exciting part of the find was that a glacier could exist at only 2 meters above sea level so far south. Of course we immediately mounted an expedition to study the Foss-McDonald Glacier.

When we reached the remote location of Dennis Port we asked around for any information. It took us quite a while to locate anyone who had heard of the phenomena.  He told us the glacier grew in the middle of the driveway of a local cottage. The cottage was at the south end of Swan Pond and was the first obstruction to the wind for several kilometers. Of course the native, in his backwards, quaint way, said “a couple of miles” instead of “several kilometers.” Continue reading